Another busy weekend for the club; with ParkRun, waterproof-ladies Sunday-Social, but the main spectacle being the annual Jedburgh 3 Peaks Ultra – and it felt only appropriate to turn over the scribing to our man at the scene – men’s skipper, John Kirby…

Saturday brought about another club favourite in Jedburgh 3 Peaks Ultra. With John Kirby, Claire Knox, Jenny Yeo, Kieran Ridley, Glen Cooper, Paul Stephenson, Marc Runkee and Paul Brunger taking part in full event. We also had #SquadGoals enthusiasts of team “Fantastic 4” Melanie, Sarah, Natasha and Lindsey tutu’ing their way round and team “Desperate Measures” Laura aka Helga, Jonno aka Hans, Eleanor aka Heike and Rob aka Heinrich who mistakenly thought they were at Oktoberfest. Rumour has it, running 38 miles is the desperate measures you need to take to get away from your kids for a day.

For Men’s club captain Kirby, the day started a 4:45 alarm and picking up Jedburgh virgin Kieran for the long journey north for an 8am start. Despite warnings the day before about setting off a little earlier, Female club captain Knox decided 6am was a perfect time to leave. As expected, that was delayed even further with Paul “faffing about” before setting off. It’s not clear how they got up in a record time, but we hear they were flown in by borrowing Kevin Keegan’s testimonial chopper.

As the group arrived, we were all greeted with the amazing spectacle of Laura wearing Rob’s favourite wig, and the lederhosen wearing, Team Desperate Measures. The most frequent comments being “WOW” and “I bet that’s itchy”. Pre-race photo taken, with everyone making the picture for the first time ever, everyone warmed up with a bit of YMCA choreography by some unicorns and the squad was off.

It was at this point running down the small hill from the start that we realised the effects storms Anges and Babet – it was VERY muddy from the off! As the group pushed to check point one at Maxton, the early pace setters John and Jenny discussed the upcoming mud alley which, in the past, had been the only bad bit on the full route. Luckily for them, they got through the trench of mud without issue, but this was not to be the case for all…

Only 8 miles in, Kieran decided he needed a lie down so he could ponder the next 30 miles to go. Lying flat on this back in mud alley just happened to be the perfect spot. Knoxy shouting “eeeh get up” was not enough to stop him taking his break. In the words of Kieran it was “death by mud”. It was all ok though, as the squad goals crew were there helping to support all DVRC runners, helping fill bottles and more importantly taking pictures of Kieran, to motivate everyone not to take a nap.

Checkpoint 2 brought about a fallen hero in John’s cheese and pickle sandwiches, which he dropped in the mud, in the climb up the Eldon’s. RIP sandwich – we hardly knew ye. The climb up the hills was gruelling for all, but there would be controversy early on, as Jenny Yeo was spotted, or rather not touching the trig point at the top!

Checkpoint 3 leads you to the much loved play park of doom, where you can be expected to get attacked by a bad T-Rex and Pteranodon. This proved a step to far for Paul S, nursing a few injuries, he called it a day at the play park, but I am sure he will be back for more bonkers fun next year. Those lucky enough to nail their landing on the slide may have been lucky enough to get a free hug voucher to inspire everyone to get back to Maxton for the final 10 miles.

From Maxton, and having been informed of Kieran mud bath by the crewing relay teams at the Rhymer’s Stone, everyone was very cautious going up mud alley. First home was John, who got a second wind in the last miles to pip Ultra Queen Jenny to the finish in times of 7:06:49 and 7:08:06 respectively.

Desperate Measure came in with a time of 7:17:34, with Laura’s blonde locks still looking perfect – who knew you could run with such grace in Bravarian Dirndl! 3rd place was Marc taking 30 minutes off his PB in a time of 7:46:58 who also claimed a spot price for being the happiest person at Bon Jedward! Much to everyone’s disbelief, with Marc stating it was more delirium than a smile. Fantastic 4 finished in a time of 7:59:07 with Linsey sprinting the line to make sure they got under 8 hours.

With a large group of us finished powered by spicy soup and bread, it was all about cheering in the rest of the DVRC crew home. Paul was next with a time 8:24:22 followed right behind with Claire 8:24:24 and Glen 8:24:28. Final man home was Kieran 8:56:33 who powered over the line to claim the top prize of muddies runner! What a day!

Lindsay Dover – “Was fab to be part of the relay team, not only did we get to run it, but we got to support everyone doing the ultra! Best of both. Btw well done everyone it was an epic day”

Claire Knox – “Overall, amazing support from the relay runners and from each other, it got us through the best times, tough times, the muddy times and the finish line”

Thanks John.

This club, man – mint.

Meanwhile at ParkRun, we had club members tackling the courses of Denton Dene, Windy Nook, Whitley Bay, Gateshead, Blackhill, Newbiggin and Chopwell Wood. Will Lacey grabbed himself a first place at Windy Nook in his first attempt at the course! Great work, Will! While there was a new course PB for Chris Hewitson in 3rd place at Denton Dene, no doubt aided by the marshalling presence of better half, Bex. Beth Ramsden took on Run Director duties at Chopwell, however this wouldn’t have the same impact for husband Grant, who managed to turn up late and miss the start – but still managed to pick off a load of the field to finish 8th!

Finally, as ever, it wouldn’t be a weekend round up with the Sunday Social – it was a waterproof ladies special, as Kirsty and Sue headed out to same the mud pools of the woods in Chopwell. Nowt stops those two!

Our Halloween run beckons on Tuesday… If you thought these outfits were bad, you ain’t seen nothing yet.